zenn bites...

i know kang fei better, after his passing.

the anecdotes and testimonials his close friends and family shared last night told a tale of a passionate young man who had beliefs and goals far greater than i have, and who, in his 22 years, have touched more hearts deeper than i ever will.

will i ever be so selfless?

the service made me think: if i am to die tomorrow, will so many people be able to say that i truly touched their lives? will so many people reminisce my past and my passions? will so many people come to bid me farewell? will so many people love me and be able to honestly say that i loved them and treated them well?

me being my closeted self, will so many people even know me?


i see people who love themselves more than they'll ever love anyone else. am i like them?

i don't want to be.

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it's ironic, that the one person i'm able to talk about all these things with, is the one who has caused me the most pain. thank you dear, for last night.