zenn bites...

dodge the bullet or carry the gun.

today, one of us got hit.
killed off. without any preamble.
a phone call, a short meet-up,
the end.

"i was asked to leave.
today's my last day."

a part of her feels relieved, she said.
a decision taken off her hands.
contemplation changed to choicelessness.
"now i can go swimming in the afternoon", she teased.

i couldn't overlook the other part of her
that was peeping from behind this brave front.

we tried to make sense of it.
i sat there in shock, disgusted.
all i could do was give her a hug,
wondering if the baby in her tummy's feeling my loss.

i wrote, a parting gift,
trying to put fond memories to words.
gratitude, encouragement, hope.
i ended up with scrawled lines of jumbled abcs.

i'd thought that i'd be the first to go.
now with one down in this war,
should i escape?
or lie here waiting to be murdered?